How You Can Strengthen Your Emotional Intelligence To Become A Better Leader

From self-awareness to empathy
Highlights:
1
Emotionally intelligent managers reduce employee turnover by four times
2
Discover your self-awareness archetype and sharpen your emotional landscape
3
Boost team engagement with empathy and emotional intelligence in virtual settings
There are many useful skills leaders need to hone, but emotional intelligence is among the most important.

As increasing scrutiny is placed on company culture, this skill’s relevance is only growing - particularly because younger generations entering the workforce are prioritizing wellbeing as well as feeling seen and heard by their employers and peers.

Harvard Business School defines emotional intelligence (EQ) as “the ability to understand and manage your emotions, as well as recognize and influence the emotions of those around you”. EQ is now recognized as a game-changing skill for leaders to stand out.
Recent insights from Niagara Institute show that employees with emotionally intelligent managers are four times less likely to leave their jobs - yet only 22% of leaders have mastered this skill.
If you’re wondering how to improve your own EQ, look no further: Here are four cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) techniques to stand out as a leader.

1
Pinpoint Your Self-Awareness Archetype
Emotionally intelligent people are self-aware. Tuning into and understanding your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors - and how they affect those around you - are essential to honing this trait.
Why is self-awareness important?
  • Firstly, it serves as the foundation for other components of emotional intelligence, such as self-regulation, empathy, and social skills.

    When you are aware of your emotions, you can manage them more effectively, leading to better stress management and conflict resolution.
  • Secondly, self-awareness enhances empathy by enabling you to understand your emotional responses and, in turn, the emotions of others.
Besides recognizing your emotional states, there are other foundations you can assess and build to improve your self-awareness: your strengths, weaknesses, values, and motivations

A good starting point is figuring out where you fit among the four self-awareness archetypes:

Introspector
Aware
 Seeker
Pleaser
— so that you can more constructively create a plan of action to strengthen this trait. These four archetypes are mapped out across a matrix that accounts for internal self-awareness (how well you know yourself) and external self-awareness (how well you gauge how others perceive you).

Understandably, you may struggle to pinpoint your archetype in theory alone. Paying attention to your emotional reactions is a great way to overcome this uncertainty.
To do so, figure out triggers for strong emotional responses so you can anticipate and manage your emotions and behaviors more effectively.

Dedicate some time to write down these triggers and how you react to them. This will help you develop strategies to handle similar situations in the future.
When you experience an emotion, try to identify and label it accurately. Instead of saying you’re feeling “bad,” determine if you feel angry, sad, frustrated, or anxious.
The more detailed and honest you are about your feelings, the better, as this practice helps you become more precise in mastering your emotional landscape.
Useful tools for tracking progress in developing emotional intelligence include regular self-assessments through questionnaires or journals.

Moreover, taking tests like the Emotional Intelligence Appraisal or the EQ-i 2.0 can provide more insights into your unique behaviors while providing structured feedback to help map out an action plan.

Asking for feedback from your colleagues and family will also help you better gauge your external self-awareness.

2
Put Yourself in Others’ Shoes
Empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, is at the core of emotional intelligence. For some individuals, tapping into others’ emotions doesn’t come naturally and is a major challenge. Fortunately, empathy is a skill that can be developed and strengthened through certain strategies and exercises.
  • Start with active listening: Focus fully on the person speaking without interrupting or planning your response while they are talking. This practice involves paying close attention to their words, tone, and body language. By truly listening, you can better understand people’s perspectives and emotions.
  • Next, adopt the habit of perspective-taking. Try to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and imagine how they might feel in a given situation. You can do this through conversations where you actively seek to understand the other person’s viewpoint by asking open-ended questions and encouraging your peers to share their experiences and feelings.
  • Lastly, practice emotional labeling. When interacting with others, try to identify and label their emotions accurately. For example, if someone seems frustrated, acknowledge their feeling by saying, “It sounds like you’re feeling frustrated.” This not only shows that you are paying attention but also validates their emotions.

3
Overcome Virtual Barriers
It’s no secret that we live in a digitalized world, and virtual interactions are inevitable in our daily routines. Teleworking, however, can feel less personal and may hinder your development of emotional intelligence.

Therefore, as a leader, it’s vital to adopt and implement strategies to overcome these challenges as part of your EQ-building journey so you can ensure team engagement.
Regular and structured communication is essential. Scheduling consistent check-ins and team meetings helps maintain a sense of connection.

Encouraging everyone to keep their camera on is important here, as seeing facial expressions and body language enhances communication and empathy. During these meetings, make space for team members to share their thoughts and feelings.
Alongside this, create opportunities for informal interactions to maintain the social aspect of work. Virtual coffee breaks, team-building activities, and casual chat channels can replicate the spontaneous conversations that occur in the office. For example, Verizon started scheduling meetings with a 5- or 10-minute lag start time to give people breathing room.
Their results are impressive, with 90% of employees reporting that overall meeting effectiveness had improved, and 78% felt they wasted less time sitting in meetings where their live participation wasn’t required.
If you find that you or your team members struggle to engage with virtual interactions, implement additional CBT techniques.

For example, start actively participating in meetings. This means turning on your camera, contributing to conversations, and actively listening to your peers’ opinions. These habits will help you feel more connected and present with your team.

4
Lead by Example
As a leader, you should practice what you preach. By creating a work environment that values emotional intelligence, you can make it the norm and inspire everyone in the team to strive to improve their EQ.

Introduce opportunities for team members to reflect on their emotional responses and interactions, such as through journaling or group discussions.
Providing constructive feedback is a great way of helping employees recognize their strengths and areas for improvement in emotional intelligence.
Take this to another level by organizing training sessions focused on emotional intelligence. There are many top-level institutions, such as Harvard University and the University of Oxford, that provide external education for business leaders and professionals to improve their EQ.
A more budget-friendly strategy is sharing books, articles, and online resources that offer insights and practical tips on enhancing EQ.
These courses and resources should focus on relevant topics such as self-awareness, emotional regulation, empathy, and social skills.
These techniques are all proven strategies for honing your EQ to become a better leader.

Use these tools to cultivate a culture of empathy, engagement, and trust among your team. Emotional intelligence is more than just understanding your feelings - it’s what will elevate your career success and make you stand out.
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